Courage at Twilight: The After Words (Forgiveness)

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My final (and 500th) entry in Courage at Twilight touches on forgiveness, which I hold to be the most powerful transformative life force in the universe.  As awesome as are the creative cosmological forces of nature, like black holes and supernovae and spiraling galaxies and evolution, the force of forgiveness is what exalts the human soul, both in the giving and in the receiving.  Living 1,262 days with caregiving and hospice provided ample opportunities for hurt and misunderstanding all around, and hence for forgiveness.  My siblings have been extraordinarily kind and forgiving as I have cared sincerely but imperfectly for their beloved father and mother.  They love and accept me even in the midst of my missteps.  They forgive.  My mother forgives me when I lose patience with her deafness and confusion, seeing me always as her darling boy.  In my father’s new life sphere, he understands me fully and pierces the mists of my depression and fear: he forgives me all my trespasses.  For you to whom I have been insensitive and for whom I have not been fully present in love, I desire your forgiveness.  This life is not designed for perfection, but for struggle and growth.  In any event, perfection I cannot do.  But I can do the work of life, and I will, forgiving myself along the way.

(Pictured: flower meadow beneath Mount Timponogos, Utah, a favorite hike of Dad’s and of his children and grandchildren.)

11 thoughts on “Courage at Twilight: The After Words (Forgiveness)”

  5. Dawn's avatarDawn

    I pray this very same desperately needed request to my loved ones alive and elsewhere. Tears in my eyes. I hope that I can be as you and forgive myself. Thank you so much for sharing. I hope you do not stop blogging. You are of the rare (as it seems) sincere blogspere (or whatever people call it) individuals. We’ve been lucky (or blessed) to encounter some.

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    1. Roger Baker-Utah's avatarRoger Baker-Utah Post author

      Your sacrifices for your own father inspired me greatly! What an ordeal you experienced! I cannot imagine a more worthy effort than yours. The experience is now part of who you are. I am so grateful for your kindness and support throughout my long and challenging journey. 💛

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